In a relationship, certainty develops over a period of time. It is natural to be unsure of the partner in the initial stages of the relationship. However, if you are still unsure of the relationship even after a long period of time, it is important to reconsider. “Many people will struggle to be completely certain, not because it’s the wrong relationship or person, but simply because there are not many unknowns. With that in mind I would say, don’t aim for certain but rather, aim for contentment,” wrote Therapist Lucille Shackleton. Here are a few questions to ask ourselves when we feel that we are not sure of the partner and the relationship.
- Are they good for us? – We should try to understand if they are healthy for us, if we feel safe with them and if we can trust them completely.
- Do they choose me? – In a relationship, it is important to repeatedly choose the partner. We should try to understand if they consider us a priority in their lives.
- Do they treat me well? – We should know the way they treat us and how we feel when we are around them. In a relationship, we must be treated with care, respect and kindness.
- What do we need to change to feel more sure? – We need to turn inwards and ask ourselves if there is something that we must change in order to feel more sure of the relationship.
- Do we respect and admire them? – A relationship should be based on respect, admiration, appreciation, loyalty and trust. This fosters stronger emotional connections.
